Finding Your Inner Beauty
Everyone has a story or a passion that expresses their individuality. Our strength lies in embracing that story without filtering it through a societal definition of beauty. National Inner Beauty Day (October 7) is a time to explore what beauty means to each of us.
Guest Blogger Eric Dorsa from Love Your Tree shared their journey to discover their inner beauty with NAMI Chicago this year.
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In my journey as a Mental Health Advocate, I have come to believe that no one condition, feeling, emotion, circumstance, treatment, or sense of healing lives in its own bucket. Everything is connected and all of it is necessary for healing. You don’t have to be in recovery from an Eating Disorder, like me, to struggle with body acceptance.
In my eating disorder, I viewed my body as dangerous. As a queer person, I felt like it was my body that moved through the world in a societally unacceptable and feminine way. It was my body that was attracted to boys instead of girls. It was my body that wasn’t athletic. It was my body that was being teased and made fun of. I learned to blame my body for all the negatives in my life.
What I experienced as a young queer person was very real, and I had nobody to talk to about the messages I was receiving from others that I was wrong or incorrect because I was queer.
In my many conversations with people who haven’t experienced an eating disorder we tend to agree that it is hard to love your body, and to derive your worth from more than what you look like. Body image isn’t just about the size, shape, and the other physical features associated with a body. Body image is also how you see yourself in your relationships; how you see yourself in your life; and how you see yourself in your work and your future. Body image is integrally linked to self-image.
My brain is also a part of my body. How I view my mind is just as important to my sense of self as how I view my body. It has taken me years (11 to be exact) to realize that my mental wellness is directly tied to how I see myself. We live in an image driven culture that thrives off of each of us not believing that we are enough. Even the mental health world is sometimes driven by the narrative that you cannot be ok unless you can afford this treatment, or that therapist.
I have learned to redefine what is considered beautiful for me. Finding a community of people who are also seeking healing has shown me that we, as humans, have way more experiences in common than experiences that set us apart. This knowledge has helped me to see myself and my worth as unconditional. My community has shown me that my identity is worth celebrating. I have also learned that my mind and my struggles are the most valuable tool that I have in navigating a world that is full of stigma and beauty that is only skin deep. I don’t always feel great about myself or my mental health, and that’s been true for a long time. But what is different now is that when I feel the shame starting to swirl around me, I tell on it and I speak to it. I talk to myself the way I would talk to a friend. Today, I know that who I am is much more important than what I look like or what my life looks like to others. Who I am inside is what I chose to feed today.
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Love Your Tree is an arts-based program for people of all ages focused on cultivating self-compassion, body acceptance and positive mental well-being through creativity, community connection, and self-reflection.